Post-cerclage, Part 2

I was up early at the clinic this morning. It's hard to sleep with all that is swirling around in my head. The nurses seem to have awoken as well- there is clinking and walking and buzzing and ringing outside of my door and I was expecting someone to come in at any moment to pump something else into my arm or give me some other pill to take. And, I was thinking about every day of the rest of this pregnancy and how I was going to do it. Not good. I had a visit from my doctor last night who begged me, several times, to realize how important it is to "take it easy". She explained that upon seeing my cervix, she realized how very short it already is and that I basically need to be a some form of bed rest from now on. I kept asking questions as to what this means: could I shower? could I cook? could I leave the house? She gave me permission to leave the house maybe once a week for Scotty to take me for a drive. But basically, I need to lay down wherever I am and try not to get up or walk around most of the day. How does one do this??? I have an almost 3 year old who needs me and wants things and wants to play. What if she needs my help in the bathroom? What if I forgot to get something out of my room that I needed? The feeling that I've already been experiencing of being slightly nervous about every movement I make is just going to intensify. And how do I go to the park for Natty's birthday party next week?! That's something that will be very sad to miss. And that brings up this whole other topic- missing things. We're leaving for the states in a month and a half. I've dreamed of spending time with my family at the library, stores, restaurants we like, parks, etc... I'm going to miss all of that! Instead, I'll be confined to the house- to the couch. Yes, this does very much sound like complaining to me too. Please know these are the first moments of this news really starting to settle in and it's a pretty hard blow to take. I have a lot of work to do to really change my perspective on this pregnancy. With Natty, I lived a very normal, active lifestyle and had no problems. With Zion, the same until unexpected, sudden things started happening at 28 weeks. It's very hard to grasp an entire pregnancy of limits, pretty strict limits. But, I've already realized as I did before that I'm just going to have to take things a day at a time. I want to be thankful for the new child God has given us and make myself resolute in doing whatever it takes, at whatever cost to me and my family, for this baby to be born healthy. As I say that, however, I balk at the idea of my husband and daughter suffering because of my limitations. I will not be available for Natty like she would want me to be or like I want to be. I will have to call upon Scotty to do far more than he already does for us, which is quite a bit. They, too, will have to sacrifice. There's a verse people quote from the Bible quite frequently that says something about God not giving you more than you can bear. That verse does not exist. I think they're thinking of 1 Corinthians 10:13, which says something different. God gives us things we can't bear all the time so that we will come to Him and let Him bear them for us. This is one of those times the Lord is asking me again to come to Him and let Him take this burden and give me a greater portion of grace to thrive in this situation. I'm not sure how we'll do it but I know this isn't as surprising to Him as it is to me and He's got something worked out already. I must rest in that and know that He cares for my family more than I can. Thanks for listening to me work out what are my first thoughts of all of this...they probably aren't too pretty.